Gravity
by Shinsun
Summary: AU YAOI time travel fic request. Goku accidentally destroys the Earth and tries to travel back in time to fix his mistake, but a misinterpreted wish and a grudge with a prince results in the creation of an entirely new world. Goku tries to tread lightly, but the gravity of life and love may cause him to leave a bigger footprint than he intended. GokuXVegetaXKakarot
1. Chapter 1

"_Time present and time past _

_Are both perhaps present in time future_

_And time future contained in time past._

_If all time is eternally present_

_All time is unredeemable."_

_-_Burnt Norton

T.S. Elliot

Gravity – Chapter 1

_((Every chapter is gonna start with a quote, most from Burnt Norton because that's what this fic was inspired by. This takes place just after the whole Frieza fiasco and the three years where Goku was on Yardrat. Any historical inaccuracies are subject to the plot._

_-Shinsun))_

It was a mistake. Hear me now, though I'm likely to reiterate; it was a _mistake._ I could call it human error; a simple miscalculation that could have been avoided… but I am not human. Regardless, it was completely _my_ fault that planet Earth was destroyed. I could have stopped it if I could have stopped myself; but I was blinded by anger.

Anger at the petty humans that surrounded me day in and day out, at the way they stared at me like I was a freak, the whispers… Gods, I hated the damn whispers. Anger at the world, and by extension the universe, for cheating me out of any semblance of "normal". Anger at my wife. Oh yes,she was _definitely_ the holder of a significant chunk of unadulterated _unfairness_ that caused me to do what I did.

Always mocking me, degrading me, _controlling _me, like I was her personal property. She assumed me an inane delinquent that couldn't add two and two , much less decode the blatant abuse she threw at me like dirt with her words. But I was no fool, nor am I now, nor have I ever been. They say love is blind, and I no doubt loved my wife. But I suppose the saying doesn't go as far as Saiyans, because I wasn't blinded. I knew what she did, what she said, and why it was wrong.

And I hated myself a good deal of the time, simply because I wanted to strangle her – and just about everyone else – for buying the charade I'd put up _myself_ years ago. For my own good, of course.

I disguised myself as a simpleton and hid my true intelligence behind a careless grin and a _limited_ vocabulary to keep myself safe. If anyone knew how cunning and sharp I could truly be, they would either treat me like a monster or shun me. I'd seen it happen before; and I thanked my stupid self-imposed mask where I'd hated it in the past and resented it now.

I don't know why, but I wanted _someone_ to see past the barrier I'd put up. Perhaps an age-old pursuit of a trust and companionship I'd never have.

And now I'd _never_ have it, because I destroyed my home; the home of billions, in fact.

Like I said, it was a mistake. I see that now, but I sure as hell didn't then.

I'd finally snapped. I'd had enough of wife's undisguised insults, my "friends'" pity, my ex-rival's taunts. And it was in fact during a spar with said ex-rival that I finally did snap. Vegeta. I suppose this whole mess was more his fault than anyone's, simply because he couldn't keep his stupid mouth shut.

I was already simmering from a spat with my wife, in which she'd called me an incompetant moron (and much worse) and I'd taken it without retalitation. Yes, I could very well have blown her head off her shoulders and been done with it; but I decided the mature thing to do would be to walk away.

I tried to vent off steam by engaging Vegeta in a spar like I usually did. The usual taunts and smartassed remarks bounced off like always, and I closed my ears to him in favor of simply fighting. Left, right, duck, block. I got lost in the rhythm after a while, and he pulled me violenly from me reverie with an underhanded comment that I thought was below him.

"In a rush to get your defeat over with, are we? Got someone else you need to utterly _fail_ before day's end?"

The barbed words sunk a little too deep, I think. Sure, I knew I was little more than an idiot third-class punching bag in the prince's eyes, but I'd never thought myself a _failure._

"That wasn't nice, Vegeta." I admonished. Usually I didn't really care what he said, but I was in a bad enough mood already and it was a struggle not to insult him in return.

"All the fire's gone out of your eyes," the prince sneered, "Did I touch a nerve?"

"Stop." I said warily, "I should go, my wife'll be waiting for me."

Just an excuse to leave; ChiChi could care less whether I came back or not. Still, I'd rather not face whatever scowling taunts His Highness was sure to throw at me.

"Speaking of," Vegeta said sleekly, "I haven't seen the little whore in a while, you know."

I flinched at the cruel word, but otherwise kept my cool on the outside.

"Why do you even care?"

"I'll tell you," he was on a roll here, and I could tell he was enjoying himself, "Shh, it's a secret." He leaned close and whispered in my ear, "_I slept with her."_

I backed away from him like he was something ungodly foul.

"Wh-What? _Why?_" Notice I didn't accuse him of lying. Vegeta did many things, but he never lied.

He shrugged carelessly, "Why not?"

"Why _not?!_" I shouted.

He ignored me cockiy, "She was a tolerable fuck, but I've had better." he put on an absolutely evil leer, "What's the matter, Kakarot? Going to cry?"

I said nothing, but I was shaking with rage. Next thing I knew the planet was just gone. I must have teleported at the last second to escape the blast; and I found myself on New Namek, scratching my head and wondering what the hell happened. Gods, I was so stupid. It makes me almost sick to think about now.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

"_But such judgements come more_

_from a man's_

_forced manner of living than from_

_his reason."_

_-_The Burning of the Dream

Gravity – Chapter 2

I'm sorry. Now, suddenly the remorse swamps through me. The regret and shame of utterly obliterating an innocent world that asked for no such destruction. I'm sorry...

I took in my surroundings. Spindly trees blue-ish grass and endless expanses of emerald sky and water. Same old, same old on New Namek. Two of the three suns were in the sky at the time; virtually baking the soil under the radiation. I supposed Namekians were used to the heat, but I certainly wasn't. I was aware that my presence would soon draw a crowd, and I really didn't need questions that I had no answers to. Too many such questions.

A simple goal arranged itself in my mind. Get the dragonballs. Fix this. But Namekians kept their huge versions of the dragonballs in their villages, under guard. I wasn't perturbed by this; it never stopped Frieza... it never stopped Vegeta...

A shiver of rage snaked down my spine. Just thinking the prince's name brought back the fury from before.

"Bastard," I muttered grimly, and set off on foot without looking back.

Usually it would unnerve me; the prospect of _stealing_ something sacred, bit at the moment I just wanted to right my one great wrong... even if it meant Vegeta would be brought back too if I got my wish.

X

Stealth was never my strength, but speed definitely was. Determination and lingering anger lent my feet wings as I sprinted in the shadows. Normally I'd fly, but in a world with little cover and inhabitants much more observant than humans, it would be risky. Of course, they couldn't raise a hand against me, not that they'd want to, but I didn't want to have to explain why I needed the dragonballs; didn't want to try to justify what I did.

So, I didn't want to be caught.

I reached a village on the edge of the roiling mass of green water that was probably a sea; I didn't know much about Namek's geography, so I wasn't sure.

I darted around a shallow cliff face. The villagers were out, watering their rows of plants. I remembered Gohan telling me about how the natives had tended to huge fields of hydrangea plants back on the original Namek.

Something swooped in my stomach when I realized with the destruction of Earth, I had essentially killed my own son. He was barely ten years old.

_I **have**__to fix this._

Stealing the dragonball was easy. When the Namekians' backs were turned, I bolted for the hut in the center of the village – though I suppose "hut" is a primitive word in this instance - where the melon-sized orb was revealed in plain sight, on a pedestal right inside the doorway.

I bet they didn't even suspect a thing; even now, when Frieza had caused such universal chaos not four years ago.

I took my prize and left the village as quickly as I could manage.

I found refuge in a cave when it started pouring. There had barely been a cloud in the sky two hours ago, and now it was a full-blown storm.

While the elements raged outside, I lit a fire with some dead branches, and took a moment to think and watch the ghostly reflection of the flames dance on the glass-smooth surface of the dragonball I'd stolen.

One down, six to go.

...Exactly what was I going to wish for when I did gather all seven? I'd have to get a Namekian to summon the dragon anyway, it didn't respond to anything but its native language.

It seemed a simple enough wish, or _wishes_, I suppose, since I'd need all three. One to bring back Earth, another to bring back its inhabitants... what to do with the third?

I could wish for no one to remember what I did, but where would that leave me? Everyone would still treat me like trash, and then of course it wouldn't change that Vegeta had slept with my wife. I could wish that he _hadn't _done that... but then I would have destroyed Earth for no reason. I could wish the bastard prince from existence, but I had a feeling that would cause more harm than good.

There was only one thing to do then. I'd have to fix it myself.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

"..._And soon he will of himself perceive that the beauty of one form is akin to the beauty of another; and then if beauty of one form in general is his pursuit, how foolish would he be not to recognize that the beauty in every form is one and the same!"_

_-_Excerpt from Plato:Symposium (360 B.C.E) _Diotima of Matinea_

Gravity – Chapter 3

My third shameful act – my first being destroying the Earth, and my second being stealing the Namekian dragonballs – was kidnapping an elder from one of the villages I plundered. It was the third day since Earth had ceased to exist; and hunger had made me irritable – there was no food to speak of on Namek, as the inhabitants only consumed water. I had gathered the seven giant dragonballs on the previous two days, and now I simply needed a translator to summon the dragon. Much easier said than done; the elders were stubborn as steel.

Luckily, steel was very easy for me to break.

Unlike the elder, who only had his honor and his vow of silence at stake; I knew that without the Earth I would surely die of starvation. My resolve was stronger because I had the more to lose.

The old Namekian flinched under the steely gaze I fixed him with as I dropped him in the cave that had served as my home these past few days. The elder's yellowed eyes landed on the cluster of dragonballs in the center of the cave and he shuddered visibly.

"No," he uttered, before I could even speak, "I won't do it."

He must have thought me a villain seeking to rule the universe or some such nonsense. I'd thought my battle with Frieza had made me into an idol among the Namekians; apparently I was wrong. Of course, I couldn't correct him... not yet.

"I need to summon Parunga," I said swiftly, taking hold of the front of the old Namekian's robes, "You're going to help me do it."

"Why?" the elder challenged, "What do you hope to accomplish? What is your wish? Immortality? Universal dominion?"

I rolled my eyes impatiently and tightened my grip on his robes,

"I need to travel back in time, but I don't have a machine to do so," I remembered the boy Trunks who had visited from the future and killed Frieza in my stead, "Also, I need to revive a planet called Earth and its inhabitants."

"I know of Earth," the elder muttered bitterly, "My family sought refuge there when the original Namek was destroyed by Frieza. I assume you know _him."_

I sighed tiredly, "I do know him. Or rather, I _knew_ him."

"You were one of his minions, I assume?" the elder growled.

"Hardly." I said bluntly, "I tried to kill him."

I had hoped I would be able to pull this off without giving too much information, but this old Namekian was making it difficult. I couldn't let him leave without achieving my goal, however, or the whole planet would know about this. I don't know why I leaned so far into secrecy, but I wasn't about to jump at the chance to divulge what had happened. What I had _done._

"Who are you?" the Namekian elder growled.

"That's none of your concern," I retorted, "Now, will you do as I say or do I have to _force_ you?"

The elder scoffed, "How could you possibly force me? Do your worst, I have no fear of death or punishment."

I exhaled slowly, trying to rein in my impatience. I was famished, and frustrated as all hell. If I didn't get this wrinkled sack of bones to cooperate, I might never fix my mistake, and I might die out here. My grip on the elder's robes moved so that my fingers were around his throat.

"Not afraid of death?" I said icily, "I could snap your neck as easily as a twig."

Though he remained stubbornly silent, I caught a flash of terror in his eyes, hidden by skepticism. He wasn't sure if I could do what I said, and there was also the question of whether I _would._

"You wouldn't," he decided boldly.

_Enough of this,_ I though with an irritated snarl.

My patience drained and I tightened my grip, almost cutting off the Namekian's air.

"Wouldn't I?" I hissed.

The elder's eyes widened in fear, his hands scrabbling at my own frantically. I didn't power up for risk of revealing my identity; but I kept the threatening choke-hold on the old one's throat.

He must have felt the fragile bones in his neck beginning to give under the pressure, because he finally expelled the breath he'd been holding and burst out, "Okay, alright! I'll do what you ask, just let me go, _please!"_

He was almost sobbing by the time I released him; and when I did, he sat back against the wall, gasping for breath and shivering in fear.

_I'm sorry,_ I thought resentfully, _I wouldn't have done it, I know, but that was a terrible thing to do._

Much as I'd learned to hate and deceive over the years, I was still a good person – as far as I knew – and I still held respect for the elderly. Once again, my anger had gotten the best of my, and once again I did something I regretted as a result.

"I'll summon Parunga," the Namekian panted, "But I can't guarantee he will grant your requests."

"Do what you have to to get him to comply," I said flatly, tired of arguing, "It's very important."

X

Once the dragonballs had been moved outside – where the dragon would have room to be released – and the weather had cleared, I went back for the Namekian.

I expected him to try to escape once he was out of the cave, but he didn't; and that said a lot about his honor.

He spoke some gibberish that I assumed was Namekian language, and the seven orbs glowed brightly. In contrast, the sky darkened and a roaring wind filled the air.

With a whoosh, a beam of yellow light poured from the seven balls. The beam twisted and coiled and transformed into the serpentine form of the enormous Namekian dragon, Parunga.

"**Why have you summoned me?**" the beast roared. I never did understand why, if the dragon itself spoke in common-tongue, it only responded to Namekian.

The elder turned to me expectantly, though his gaze was still wary and retained some hostility.

"Tell him to restore the planet Earth with the first wish, and to bring back its inhabitants with the second."

The elder spoke another string of gibberish, and the dragon growled.

"**Those are not easy wishes,"**__he bellowed, "**But they shall be done."**

Parunga's huge red eyes glowed, and he announced, "**It has been set in motion. What is your third request?"**

"Tell him to send me back to a time when Prince Vegeta hadn't committed the sin that caused the Earth to be destroyed." Of course, I couldn't specify _what_ that sin was, but I hoped Parunga would understand. He was an all-seeing dragon after all.

The Namekian elder translated the wish.

"**It shall be done," **Parunga roared, "**The mortal shall be transported to a dimension where the one called Vegeta is free of sin."**

"No, no wait!" I panicked, "Not another _dimension,_ just another time!"

I was too late. The dragon's eyes glowed and I felt an enormous gravity pulling on my body and soul, and I was powerless to stop it.

X

I rematerialized and inhaled as if I'd been underwater for an hour. I blinked in confusion. I was right in front of Capsule Corp. I couldn't help but feel relieved; at least the Earth was back... but I didn't have the time or the means to truly grasp what I'd done yet.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

"_This is the one way, and the other_

_Is the same, not in movement_

_But abstention from movement; while the world moves_

_In appetency, on its metalled ways_

_Of time past and time future."_

_-_Burnt Norton

T.S. Elliot

Gravity – Chapter 4

There is no feeling quite like it. The feeling I speak of is one of intense desja-vu and the awareness – the _knowledge – _that one does not belong in a given situation under any circumstance. Such is the feeling that descended on me as I stared openly at the world I'd created with a wish.

It was not the world as I knew it. There, one could see people bustling hither and thither every second of every day. And here, even in busy West City, there wasn't a soul in sight. It was an eerie sensation; to be the only one around for miles and miles. If there were passerby or any kind of civilian anywhere, I might ask what was going on, but I saw no one.

I wandered the streets; streets I knew well, but now seemed strangely foreign, though they themselves had not changed. Perhaps it was _I_ that had changed. I wasn't sure, but a primal sense of trepidation was telling me I didn't belong here at all.

The further I traveled from Capsule Corp, the more this premonition grew, as if I were a magnet rebelliously moving away from its partner and into a repelling unknown of a world.

X

Once my mind caught up with me, I thought the best thing to do would be to find someone I knew; someone who could tell me what was up. I extended my senses, searching for someone's ki; _anyone_ familiar.

Piccolo. The Namekian warrior with whom I had once quarreled. Now he was my ally and even my friend, since he'd befriended my son and helped to defeat Frieza on Namek.

I teleported, following the ki-signature, and rematerialized on a barren plateau. No big surprise; wastelands were Piccolo's favorite hang-outs.

Predictably, he immediately dropped into a defensive pose upon sighting me. Always wary, always ready for a sneak attack. He did not, however, lower is guard when he recognized me; which I thought was curious. I knew he _had_ recognized me, so why did he still look ready for a fight?

"Hey Piccolo," I greeted him, raising a hand in a wave. To my surprise, he shot forward and grabbed my wrist violently; wrenching my arm behind my back and pinning me to the ground. He showed his fangs in a snarl as he shoved my face in the dirt.

I didn't retaliate, but only because I was essentially in shock.

"Wh-what are you _doing?"_ I demanded.

"I could ask you the same, Kakarot." he growled spitefully.

"What?" I coughed on a mouthful of grit.

"You dropped your guard," he said.

"N-no, what did you call me?" I extricated myself from his grip almost _too_ easily, and turned to face him, wiping dust from my eyes.

The Namekian's eyes narrowed distrustfully.

"What are you playing at?"he snapped, "..And why the hell are you out here alone? Come to face your doom at last?"

"Y-you called me Kakarot," I said blankly, "Why?"

He looked at me like I'd lost my mind. At least he didn't attack me again.

"Did you hit your head again, Kakarot?" he sounded more confused than angry now, but he still looked hostile.

I stared at him, something wasn't right here.

"And why," he went on, circling me warily, "Had my sworn archenemy come to me without engaging in battle upon meeting? Have you forgotten our pact, Saiyan?"

"What are you _talking _about?" I shouted.

He stopped, glaring at me with eyes like daggers.

"Who _are_ you?" he challenged.

I blinked, "You...you don't know me?"

He snorted, "I _thought_ I did."

"Well..." I tried to think logically so I could figure this out, but no logic came easily to mind, "What...what do you _think_ you know about me?"

He still looked at me like I was crazy, but complied nonetheless.

"I know you're my rival. I know you'll stop at nothing to defeat me, and I know you've been plotting with that scum Vegeta to -"

I interrupted him, "Do you know where he is? Vegeta, I mean."

Maybe if I could find him, I could fix this mess. Or maybe I'd make it worse. Either way, at least I'd be moving along instead of going in circles.

The Namekian looked, if possible, even more spiteful. I felt disheartened, Vegeta probably hated me just as much in this universe as he did in my own.

"Usually that prick of a prince is always around _you_," Piccolo muttered, "I'm actually _astounded_ you aren't tangled together with him as we speak."

"You mean sparring?" I asked, confused.

Piccolo chuckled humorlessly.

"What?" I demanded, embarrassment crawling up my face as he laughed blatantly at me. I felt like an idiot, and he was treating me in kind.

"You really don't know?" he snickered, "Well, you're in for a shocker then, Kakarot."

"Stop calling me that!" I shouted, "My name is Goku, you know that!"

"Is it now?" Piccolo sneered, turning as if to leave.

"Wait! Answer me! What is going on with K- with m-me... and... and Vegeta?"

"Do you really want to know? I can see now that you're not Kakarot. You don't have a tail for one thing..."

"That's not -" I began heatedly.

"I doubt you'll be pleased," he said smoothly, "But hey, it's none of my business if you don't know that His Highness has been fucking you for years."

TBC

_((Side-note: my idea of sin and the Bible (etc)'s idea of sin are two very different things. The definition of sin in this story only applies to things that are universally wrong like stealing, cheating and murder. We'll get into detail with that later. Thanks for putting up with the short chapters._

_-Shinsun))_


	5. Chapter 5

"_Why on Earth would you want to get married when you can just buy rope by the yard and hang yourself?"_

_-_Unknown (loose paraphrasing of socrate quote)

Gravity – Chapter 5

I stared for a measureless amount of time. Finally, I untangled my tongue and my mind enough to form a single coherent word; which I voiced in an incredulous shout.

"_What?!"_

Piccolo laughed harshly, "Oh, the look on your face is _priceless!_ I would love to put it on Kakarot's face, but you'll do, if just for a laugh."

_Just for a laugh._ That was really all I was good for, wasn't it? And the universe just _loved_ making me its own personal bathroom joke, every second of every day.

"But... I..." I began, stammering, "He _hates_ me!"

"Who, Vegeta?" Piccolo snorted, attempting to rein in his mirth, "No, he's so madly in love with you, it's practically a disability."

"But...but..." I floundered, completely at a loss for words. It was just _not_ possible; no way in hell.

Despite my shock and indignation, I couldn't help wondering in a state of near terror; _What **else** is different here?_

"Wh-what about ChiChi?" I asked. Surely my wife couldn't be okay with this alleged... _relationship_, if that's what it was.

"Who?" Piccolo scowled, "What are you prattling about?"

"My... my wife..." I breathed.

Piccolo burst out into laughter again, "You have no wife! Hell, _Saiyans_ getting _married?_ The very idea...! The whole lot of them are homosexual perverts that screw each other stupid in between destroying planets!"

"The...the 'whole lot of them'?" I echoed in almost a whisper. My mind was racing to reach a conclusion, and I didn't like it when it did.

"Yeah," the Namekian muttered, "In and out of this planet like it's their personal pit stop; greedy bastards. It doesn't help that there are about eight hundred of them anyways..."

I didn't remember falling to my knees; but quite suddenly I was looking up at the Namekian, so I must have.

"But... the Saiyan planet... Frieza..." I spoke in fragments; it was all I was capable of.

"Look, I don't know what you're babbling about; but if you keep talking like that, people will think you're a nutcase."

"You don't know Frieza?" I blurted incredulously, "But he... On Namek, we..."

"You sure you didn't just break out of a mental institution? Every word out of your mouth is nonsense."

"Wait," I stood up slowly, shaking with shock, "Is this... is this even _Earth?"_

Piccolo sighed. I guess he'd ruled me out and didn't think me an enemy anymore, but now he almost looked sad.

"It hasn't been called that in years," he said dejectedly, then his voice turned sharp, "And don't use that name around _them_ or you'll get arrested."

"'Them'?" I asked quietly.

"The Saiyans. They renamed this planet almost a decade ago, and the original name is now taboo. You're not supposed to say it at all, but I won't turn you in."

"Gee thanks," I muttered sarcastically, "What's the planet called now?"

"Takhenesh,"he said it like a swear word, spitting out the syllables as if they were bitter.

I felt slightly relieved; I'd expected it to be something bad.

"You don't know what it means, do you?" Piccolo sighed, "Essentially, it's the Saiyans' word for 'conquest'. This planet is their bitch; even its name is demeaning."

I felt like I'd been slapped.

Piccolo looked around nervously, "I must leave. I've said too much, and it's not safe."

"Wait, before you go, can you tell me where I can find Vegeta?" I pleaded.

He shrugged, "He goes where he wants... but I suggest you find _yourself_ before you try to find _him."_

And with that, he took to the sky and flew away; leaving my very confused and not a little upset.

X

How the hell had I caused so much damage with just one wish? And how had I made the state of the world _worse_ by accidentally wishing that Vegeta was free of sin? Parunga's misinterpretation should have turned the prince into a saint; and instead it turned every thing backwards. Why?

I sat down exhaustedly. I was so tired, and my mind was so scrambled, that I almost didn't notice that my stomach was trying to digest itself. I hadn't eaten in almost four days, and thinking on an empty stomach was never my strong point. I needed to eat something before I figured this out. I stood and jumped into the sky, heading for civilization where, hopefully, I could get some food and some answers.

X

I landed in a small town; and just like West City, it was deserted. I was beginning to wonder if there _were_ no people. Maybe the planet had been purged like the Saiyans originally intended.

Movement caught my eye and I looked up. A wily black tomcat was rummaging in a dumpster nearby, fishing out scraps of chicken and flicking its tail warily.

I approached the creature slowly, just glad to see another living being, giving it plenty of time to run away. It looked at me with bright amber eyes before slinking out of sight into an alley.

"That's Nayan," someone said behind me. I jumped and turned around. Oh my gods... it was _Bulma._

I'd never seen her dressed in such mediocre attire, nor had I seen her expression so... haunted... like she'd seen too much too fast and lived through horrors and terrible times.

"He doesn't trust anyone, but he's good at spotting intruders, so he kind of has the run of this town." the blue-haired woman went on.

"B-Bulma?" I stammered, ignoring her chatter.

Her blue eyes narrowed with suspicion.

"How do you know my name?"

"I-I've known you since I was a kid," I said, "I'm Goku, remember?" Of course she didn't. No one did.

"Are you another ex-classmate hoping to get a share of my business? Too bad; Capsule Corp was shut down _years_ ago, okay? I _don't have_ any money!" she sounded more desperate than angry, "So get lost."

I held up my hands in apology, showing her my empty palms, "Calm down, I don't want your money."

"Well then what _do_ you want?" she challenged stubbornly.

I faltered. What _did_ I want? I wanted to fix whatever I'd done to mess up this world, but I didn't even have the full picture of it yet. So right now I just wanted information before I made any kind of decision. My stomach growled impatiently and I answered her.

"Right now all I want is something to eat."

The saccade of her eyes was slow and calculating.

"You can get all the food you need here," she said carefully, "You just have to ask the right questions. Follow me."

I did as she said, silencing my confusion and lingering panic for now.

Bulma lead me down an empty street, not looking back to see if I was following her or not.

"Why is there nobody around?" I asked, "Every place I've been to is just empty."

"There are people," she said, "But no one's outside today except the very brave, or the very _stupid."_

She flashed me a glance that seemed to ask; _Which one are __**you?**_

"Why?" I queried.

She shrugged, "It's Sunday. Nobody's allowed to leave their house on Sundays. It's kind of like the sabbath, except you get arrested if you're caught. Where have you been the past ten years? Under a rock?"

I sighed, "I guess so..."

She stopped walking and leaned against a doorway casually.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Shh, just watch." she hissed.

The door next to her opened a few inches and my Saiyan hearing picked up a man's lowered voice.

"We don't have anything."

Bulma didn't seem perturbed, "How are the little ones?"

I was confused. Why was she asking about his kids? Weren't we trying to get food?

"Growing up fast," the man replied, "Want to come meet them?"

"Can I bring a guest?"

I glimpsed a narrowed eye through the slat in the door, "If you must."

"What was _that_ about?" I whispered as the door opened and Bulma ushered me inside.

"It's a code," she explained, "Just about everyone speaks in code around here. You never know who could be listening in."

"A code for wha...?" the thought hung unfinished as I took in the room before me. It was like a bakery, or a bar, with six or seven people inside. The smell of cooking bread was heavenly.

"The person I was talking to was an innkeeper," Bulma said, "This is an inn; one of the only places you can get food without paying an outrageous price nowadays. Obviously 'inn' is code too, we have to keep them undercover or the Saiyans would shut them down."

"What about the code you said to -?" I began.

"The innkeeper said he didn't have anything, to throw anyone who didn't know the code off the trail."

"And the 'little ones'?" I asked.

"I was asking if he had any fresh bread. He said they were 'growing up fast' to tell me they were almost done baking."

I blinked, "That's genius."

"Well, we had to do _something_ to help the poor get by. The government fell apart since the Saiyans moved in. No government, no taxes, no money system. Personally, I think that's an improvement, but anyone who _does_ use money had to raise the prices of everything because there's less of it. Less supply, more demand."

"Then there are no laws?" I asked.

"I didn't say that. All the laws come from the King, but no one _really_ follows what he says."

"The King?"

"Well obviously," Bulma said easily, "The King of Saiyans. He doesn't come to Takhenesh much, so he leaves his son here to keep order. Frankly though, I don't think Vegeta was meant to be a ruler. It's like there's something missing in his life, or some huge lesson skipped over him."

I froze, realization piecing itself together in my head. Suddenly, I had the answer. The answer to everything I did. And it was the exact opposite of what I thought it was.

The answer was this: The only way Vegeta could have been completely free of sin would be if he had never been enslaved by Frieza. The only reason he had ever been evil to begin with was because Frieza made him so; and in wishing for him to be sinless – whether I meant to do that or not – I was actually wishing for sin to not have been _forced_ upon him.

And the only way that would be possible would be if Frieza had never existed at all.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

"_Words move, music moves_

_Only in time, but that which is only living_

_Can only die. Words, after speech, reach_

_Into the silence. Only by the form, the pattern_

_Can words or music reach."_

-Burnt Norton

T.S Elliot

Gravity – Chapter 6

I stayed at the inn with Bulma until my hunger had been sated. But I chewed without tasting, despite the quality and _quantity_ of bread – these people obviously knew how to feed a Saiyan, though I assumed they didn't yet know I _was_ one – and I got the feeling I was getting strange looks. I kept running the same line of thought through my head; wearing it down to nothing even as my teeth wore down the bread I forced myself to swallow.

I'd done this. I'd caused this whole mess with a misinterpreted wish; and it was all my fault that the people of this planet that had once been Earth were essentially enslaved by a race that should be long dead. My race. Strangely, I felt a sense of disloyalty as I thought of the Saiyans with such contempt. After all, they were my people; and siding with the humans they'd conquered seemed like its own form of insubordination.

But that was preposterous. I'd grown up alongside humans; lived as one of them, even _married_ one of them. And just because I _was_ Saiyan didn't mean I had to follow them when their decisions were wrong, did it? _Were_ their decisions even wrong?

As you can guess, I was very confused. Especially since I kept running myself in circles with such thoughts.

"Goku, where are you going?" Bulma asked as I got up to leave. I was glad – but a little surprised – that she'd remembered my name when I'd only said it once.

"I have to go... check something out," I said carefully. Now that I'd figured out what exactly I'd done to this planet; I was ready to confront the source of it all.

It was time to face Vegeta.

X

Somehow, I couldn't sense Vegeta's ki. I'd known him so well, but I couldn't discern his ki from anyone else's now. Had he really changed that much? Had _I_ really _made_ him change that much?

I checked the places I most associated with my old life first. Capsule Corp, of course; which I found locked and barred closed, surrounded by yellow police tape that I didn't remember seeing when I'd initially materialized here today.

Bulma had said that the business had been shut down, but I hadn't believed her until I saw it for myself.

I traveled to Triphilim City next. The city Nappa had obliterated when he and Vegeta had arrived on Earth years ago. I found it completely intact, with no sign of the destruction that was supposed to have been wrought here. Which meant Vegeta and I had never fought in the desert not far away – perhaps never fought _at all_ – ...and it meant Nappa was still alive.

I wondered... if Frieza had never existed, and no one had needed to go to Namek to wish back the people who _should_ have been killed in a fight that _should _have happened... Did anyone here even know Namek – and by extension, their dragonballs – existed? And – a worse thought that sent a chill down my spine – Had I ever become a Super Saiyan if Krillin hadn't been killed in a battle with Frieza that hadn't happened?

Many more thoughts and questions like these raced through my mind until I felt dizzy. It was truly shocking; how much could change just by removing one person. An enormous domino effect had resulted from wishing away someone who had eventually been killed anyway... and the full extent of the change may not have even been brought to light yet. I kept wondering; what else? What _else_ has changed?

I went to the Lookout next. It wasn't too different from how it usually was, so I didn't worry myself over it... until I heard the shouting.

I flew lower, confused, and realized that it was the old Namekian god Kami shouting... at _me._ _Insulting_ me, and cursing the Saiyan race in at least three languages. I winced at the harsh swears he ranted; calling me a prince's bitch, and much worse. A whore, a demon, a soul-less piece of shit... you get the idea. Of course, the curses were meant for Kakarot, not me, but I'd never seen the gentle Kami so angry; especially not directing such ire in my direction.

Feeling both crestfallen and disgusted, I flew away as fast as I could; Kami's insults bouncing off my retreating back like stones.

X

I found Mount Paozu – my home, and the home of a family that didn't exist here – completely deserted. A wild, overgrown expanse of land that showed no indication of the house that was supposed to stand here, of the memories built and the _life _that had surrounded this place.

I knelt in the clearing where my home used to be, looking bleakly at the once-familiar forest around me; and I realized I no longer knew it. Either it had changed, or I had, but I was a stranger here now. And for some reason that made me extremely sad. This was where Gohan was born, where my wife and I had lived; it was everything I knew. In the world I'd known – the world I'd _destroyed_ – I'd accidentally killed my ten-year-old son; but this was far worse. Here, he'd never even existed at all; and again, it was entirely my fault.

I left ruefully, suppressing the burning behind my eyes before it could turn into tears.

X

I traveled next to Roshi's island. The Kame house was still there; thank the gods, but when I landed and attempted to greet my old master when I found him, he looked at me first like I was a stranger, and then like I was something nasty he'd scrape off the bottom of his boot.

"I know who _you_ are," he interrupted me as I tried to explain myself.

I stopped with my mouth half-open, fearing the worst.

"You're that Kakarot guy, the one who's always hanging around with that good-for-nothing prince."

"I... I d -" I began. I'd thought for sure that at least _Roshi_ would know me; and I was right, but not in the way I'd hoped.

"Get off my island, Saiyan trash," Roshi growled, "And if I see you back here again you'll get the business end of a walking stick and a Kamehameha to the ass, clear?"

My shoulders slumped and I nodded miserably, taking flight with haste as he brandished his staff at me threateningly.

X

I flew for hours, stopping now and then in the cities I passed and asking about Vegeta's whereabouts. I always got one of two responses. The people would either recognize me – or rather, recognize Kakarot's face and think I was him – and slam their doors; or they wouldn't know who I was, or much else of use. Either way, I got no information on the prince I sought.

"Will _no one _on this godsdamn planet _help_ me?!" I shouted at the twelfth or thirteenth door that had been slammed in my face. As I expected, I got no response from anyone or anything. I'd never felt so alone; not even when all of my family and friends were dead, because at least I could wish them back. I doubted this planet that disguised itself as Earth even _had_ dragonballs.

And I wondered how I was going to fix this if that was true.

X

Just when I was about to give up, I sensed an enormous energy level flare in the distance. Only a full-blooded Saiyan could produce a ki-signal like that, and it did feel strangely familiar. Not Vegeta's ki. It was my own.

I followed the ki-signature, situations and possibilities of every array flooding into my mind. The ki – Kakarot's ki... it felt awkward to think of that name as being different from me – was not alone. Another high power level was in the same location; vying with the energy and... and _devouring_ it. That's really the only way I could explain it.

Kakarot's ki was frantic, almost _desperate_, and I wondered if he – I, whatever – was being attacked by the owner of that strange new energy. My own ki only ever spiked and quavered like that when I was in danger.

The ki signals spiraled higher in tandem, and I gave up on flying and teleported to the source of the radiating energies.

I'd thought I had pictured every possible scenario, but nothing could have prepared me for the scene that greeted me. I appeared in a room I didn't recognize, and not far away was a large bed swathed in dark crimson sheets. But that wasn't what drew my attention. I saw...myself...

The power signals I'd felt before were nearing the highest level I'd felt from them, and I zoomed out my range of vision to take in the whole scene.

I nearly fainted with shock right then and there.

So tangled was the pair of completely nude bodies before me that I almost didn't recognize the other person besides... besides _me_, I guess. But there was no denying that flame of spiked, dark hair. Nor the low, passionate groans tearing from that royal throat as the prince I thought I knew hammered into a body I barely recognized as mine. Somehow, the image had a hard time congealing in my mind, and I quickly left the room at a sprint without them noticing me, a dual, ragged scream of simultaneous release chasing me out.

I leaned against the wall in the hallway; attempting futilely to banish the image burned behind my eyelids and breathing like I'd run a mile.

Piccolo had seemed honest enough when he said Vegeta was... had been... _fucking_ me – fucking _Kakarot,_ I corrected hastily – but I didn't think... I didn't think I'd _walk in on them!_

The unfeasible image in my mind was still clear as crystal, though; so I wasn't allowed to tell myself I'd been hallucinating... seeing things... Oh, I'd _seen_ things all right... _Too many_ things.

There was something about seeing you own face twisted with raw pleasure and emotion while your sworn arch rival plowed into a body identical to yours... hearing your own breathless pleas for more echoed by a low, baritone panting... that was... _unsettling_ to say the least.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

"_Love is a serious mental disease."_

- Plato

Gravity – Chapter 7

I sat there, reeling, for a long while; listening to the soft, satiating panting coming from the room next to me as the two high power levels slowly dropped.

Don't get me wrong, I wasn't all that shocked that I had just witnessed Vegeta and... _myself_... going at it...At least, once I'd recovered initially. Piccolo had warned me beforehand, so I'd had the time to think about it. What I _was_ shocked by was that – for the first time since I'd known him – Vegeta seemed... _happy... gentle..._ like he actually _cared._ One thing I knew for sure was that a loving smile did _not_ belong on a face designed for scowling and sneering.

But... somehow – thought I was still contemplating how to change the world back to how it _should_ be - I had to wonder...

Had I accidentally made the world _better_ with this wish? Was there another side of the issue that I hadn't yet seen? What about the _Saiyans'_ story? If I had created a source of peace and happiness for the prince that had _caused_ this whole mess; had I actually solved the problem? Did I have the right to take away something that brought such a smile to a face that had been tortured by the demons of a past of slavery?

I heard voices, and I first I thought I'd been discovered; but when I listened harder to discern words, I realized they were speaking to each other.

"I wish it could stay like this," that was Kakarot. It was strange to hear my own voice coming from another's mouth, but just the same, I was curious to see his expression as he said this, and I peered around the door frame next to me, still half-hidden in shadow.

"So do I, Kakarot," I had never heard that tone of voice from Vegeta's lips before, _ever;_ much less the wistful smile that accompanied the words, "But it can't. Sooner or later this world's fragile stability of government will crumble – whether by my father's hand or its own – and it will just be a mess."

"Why do we have to stay _here_ then?" Kakarot murmured, leaning up to kiss that softly smiling mouth – and action that made me feel indecisive and strangely lonely, for some reason - "Why don't we just go home to Vegeta-sei and stay there?"

A playful smirk danced on Vegeta's lips, "I don't want you to get sunburned, for one thing. Two suns would do a number on your complexion, and I like your skin the way it is," as he said this, he dragged his tongue along Kakarot's shoulder and chest, and I could swear I heard purring.

"For another," the prince continued, "Takhenesh is a much quieter planet than home. Cleaner atmosphere, less pollution..."

I would think the opposite would be true. Was Earth cleaner now, or was Vegeta-sei less so? I also didn't like the new name for this planet spoken so casually from Vegeta's mouth. "Conquest". As Piccolo put it, the Saiyans' "bitch".

Then again, from what I'd seen of "Takhenesh" so far, there weren't a whole lot of Saiyans around, so... maybe Piccolo had been lying. Or maybe Vegeta was lying...

Wait... was lying a sin? _Could_ Vegeta _physically_ lie to anyone?

_Oh... gods, what have I done?_

I must have moved or something, because both Saiyans abruptly stood, looking unnerved. I was pretty sure they couldn't sense my energy, and I held still. I was proven right as Vegeta picked up a scouter from the bedside table and fitted it over his right ear and eye. Kakarot grabbed two pairs of dark blue gi pants and handed one to the prince. Once clothed, they advanced to where I was slowly, whispering. I didn't move, suppressing my energy. It dawned on me that if they saw me, I would have a _lot_ of explaining to do, and I silently turned to Super Saiyan as a disguise without raising my power.

The two Saiyans stopped, identical pairs of black eyes darting. The scouter beeped and and Vegeta shot forward suddenly, whipping around the corner and grabbing me by the front of my shirt before I even knew what was happening. He pinned me against the wall, and I found myself thinking; _He's no less of a battle elite, even now that he's supposedly clean of impurity._

I supposed self-defense wasn't a sin, and only curiosity kept me from teleporting away. I wanted to know about this new Vegeta; especially since he was looking at me with suspicion rather than hate right now.

"Vegeta, wait," Kakarot said, laying a hand on his counterpart's shoulder and scrutinizing me, "Who is he?"

I held my tongue since neither had addressed me, taking the time to examine the similarities – and differences – of these two Saiyans from how they should be.

I was amazed solely by the lack of stress in Vegeta's face; I'd never before appreciated how tense he'd always been until all that tension was just _gone._

"He looks like you, Kakarot." The prince murmured softly.

Kakarot tilted his head, "A little bit, yeah. Maybe one of Radditz's sons?"

I almost choked. One, I'd forgotten that my brother _would_ still be alive in this universe, and two, I'd have to be half my age to even begin to classify as one of his children.

Vegeta shook his head, "He's too old to be," he said, echoing my thoughts. I noticed that he'd released my shirt, but I didn't move from where I was; nor did I try to clarify their questions.

"You are Saiyan, though?" Kakarot asked me. I nodded mutely, noticing that they hadn't yelled at me for essentially barging into what I assumed was their house.

"What kind of Saiyan has blonde hair?" Vegeta muttered, "And green eyes?"

"No tail either," Kakarot added.

"I... uh, I was born like this," I lied, averting my gaze slightly from their double ebony stare.

"He sounds like you too," Vegeta said to Kakarot. He seemed unnerved, and rightly so, I guess.

"What is your name?" Kakarot asked, his voice a little sharper than Vegeta's honest, perplexed tone had been.

"Goku." I answered, praying that the name had as little – or less – connection to Kakarot as his name did to me.

Vegeta's eyebrows rose slightly, "That's not a Saiyan name. You're sure you're one of us?"

He didn't seem hostile, but I heard the suspicious note in his voice.

"Yes," something about his honesty was compelling me to respond in kind. I wasn't used to the almost _friendly_ look in his eye. Quite frankly, I'd expected to be attacked upon being discovered; or at the very least accused of breaking and entering or theft.

"Something doesn't add up here," Kakarot muttered, "He just... looks weird."

"Kakarot, Saiyans breed like rabbits," Vegeta consoled, "It shouldn't be surprising that an... _albino _of sorts could be produced now and then."

I almost didn't hear what Kakarot whispered in the prince's ear then, "What if he's a Super Saiyan?"

Vegeta shrugged him off lightly, "That's ridiculous... Where are you from?"

The second part of the statement was directed at me.

I shifted uncomfortably. I couldn't tell the truth; because first of all, I wasn't allowed to say "Earth", and second, I couldn't say that Vegeta-sei had been destroyed if it hadn't been in this dimension.

"Uh...I've been... here and there, I guess." I said evasively.

"Haven't we all," Kakarot sighed.

"One more question," Vegeta said, "Why _exactly_ are you in my house?"

I knew I'd get asked that sooner or later.

"It was an accident," I answered carefully, "I didn't mean to intrude."

"Hmm..." Vegeta murmured distractedly. He did back off and let me move away from the wall, but his eyes didn't leave me. He took off his scouter after a moment, and I felt like I'd been released from under a radar.

"What was his power level?" Kakarot asked Vegeta in a whisper as the prince set the scouter on the table. He probably assumed I couldn't hear him, or didn't care enough to listen.

"Sixteen thousand," Vegeta replied in monotone.

The younger of the two visibly tensed.

"No wonder you were so cautious with him; that's just two thousand below yours."

Even when I suppressed my power, it was _still_ suspiciously high.

"So... tell me, Goku," it was weird to hear my Earth-name from Vegeta's lips, but I listened anyway, "Why were you out and about instead of indoors during the sabbath? Surely you must have been outside in order to get in _here._"

Damn his wit. Even though he wasn't trying to crush me beneath his royal boot, he still had that knife-like logic and used it flawlessly. Sharp as a tack, as always.

"I... I didn't realize..." I stammered, "What I mean is, I... I forgot." I finished lamely, better to play oblivious than to explain why I _was_ out there today, and pretending to be less than clever was one of my specialties.

Kakarot sighed, "Let's not forget how Broly got himself locked away."

"Who?" I asked, confused.

"Don't tell me you haven't heard of Broly," my doppelganger said, "That guy was always out there flaunting his ridiculous power level and challenging the law. Earned him a cell in prison four years ago; it was pretty big news."

"Yeah, and you were always _mooning_ after him before he was landed behind bars with a ki-cutting collar around his neck," Vegeta said swiftly.

"I didn't '_moon'_ after him," Kakarot objected, "I _admired_ him." I could swear he was blushing. Did I always looked that flustered when I blushed?

"Don't deny it, Kakarot, you had a little _crush_ on Broly." Vegeta grinned.

"Well it's not like he ever returned the favor," my twin grumbled.

"That's right," the prince said smoothly, "You'll always belong to _me_ anyway."

Did he really have to punctuate that statement by brushing his tail against Kakarot's chest? It was shameless enough that neither of them were clothed above the waist, did they have to _flaunt_ it?

Kakarot trembled slightly, the flush across his cheeks intensifying, "I'd rather be with you than that jerk Broly any day."

"That's what I like to hear," said Vegeta.

The Vegeta _I_ knew would have blown into a homicidal rage at the thought of his... significant other... having thoughts about someone else, _if_ he even cared enough to _have_ a significant other in the first place. This whole situation still seemed beyond strange to me; and I must have been staring as blankly as my mind was, because both Saiyans paused in their casual conversing to look at me. I was still amazed that they hadn't kicked me out of their house yet. Were _all_ Saiyans this hospitable?

My stomach growled, interrupting my thoughts. The bread I'd had at the inn seemed like it had been days ago.

"Want to stay for lunch?" Vegeta asked.

I almost fell over in shock. I'd never heard those words from him before in my life and had never expected to; it just... wasn't something he said.

"Sure," I amended hastily when I realized my gaping may have offended him.

"Yeah, yeah," Kakarot muttered, "First lunch, then dinner, then you'll ask him to live here. Do you have to adopt _every_ cute thing that wanders in off the street, Vegeta?"

I took a second to decode that Kakarot had all but called _me_ cute.

"Hey, that was a one-time thing," Vegeta protested, "And you saw that puppy, it was starving."

Kakarot raised an eyebrow, "And the baby T-Rex?"

"Well... I..." the prince stammered.

I really didn't know what to make of this. Unless I was mistaken, they were _teasing_ each other. And unless I was further mistaken, it was a regular thing. I'd never seen Vegeta so casual, and I'd never seen... _myself..._ so carefree. Was it because I wasn't tied down to a wife that didn't accept me, friends that didn't understand me, and a rival that didn't give a damn about me? And had Vegeta's past really had _that_ big of an impact on his everyday life and his personality? Did I not know him _at all_ beyond the mask that years of suffering and grudges had forced on him?

...Did I know _myself_ even less?

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

"_But what if man had eyes to see the true beauty – the divine beauty, I mean, pure and clear and unalloyed, not clogged with the pollutions of mortality and all the colours and vanities of human life – thither looking, and holding converse with the true beauty simple and divine?"_

-Diotoma of Matinea (Plato: Symposium)

Gravity – Chapter 8

I don't know why I stayed. Maybe it was because Vegeta had invited me to – earning him an amused smirk from his counterpart but no repercussion. Or maybe it was because this was the first place I'd been to thus far on Takhenesh where I hadn't been glared at, shunned, or insulted. I felt... almost welcome here. It was amazing to see my own face when it wasn't glossed over with brainless enthusiasm that hid the intellect within. It was amazing, too, to see Vegeta truly happy; as if he could see a world without impurity and the contaminant of selfishness, greed, and hate. He wasn't a saint; don't get me wrong, but he was _different _than anyone I'd met in my life. He was content. If ever there was a person who had everything he wanted and needed, it was him. He wasn't lavished with riches and given control over the planet, but he didn't seem to want that. In fact, he didn't seem to want _anything;_ he was happy with what he had.

And to be honest, it scared the ever-loving shit out of me.

There were just some things that shouldn't be, and a selfless Vegeta was one of them.

"Did you sleep well?" the prince in question asked me the next morning, just outside the bedroom he'd lent me for the night.

I nodded numbly, still utterly freaked out by this cheerful, caring Vegeta. I had almost hoped that all of it had been a really bizarre dream, and I wasn't sure if I was unnerved or relieved that it hadn't been. This was that kind of situation; I didn't know whether any of this was a good thing or a bad thing.

"Good," Vegeta said smoothly, "Kakarot just left."

"Where?" I asked purely out of interest.

"Where else?" he shrugged, "It's the thirty-first day of November."

Said as if that explained everything.

"...And...?" I blinked, confused.

"Every month the King visits and runs all the Saiyan soldiers through training," he explained, as if concerned for my sanity, "To make sure they're all up to his expectation."

"Then why are you here?" I asked carefully.

"I'm a prince," he said simply, "Father doesn't expect me to fight unless I choose to, so I don't need the extra training. I'm actually surprised you weren't called in; do you not fight?"

"I... I do, I just -" I stammered, unable to come up with a lie that was convincing enough.

"You're not a soldier?" he asked, seeming perplexed.

"No," I latched onto the excuse, relieved.

"Why?" he sounded surprised, "With your power level, I would think you'd be on the front lines; an elite. All able-bodied Saiyans are required to fight by law."

I tried to force another lie to leave my mouth, but I couldn't. I simply had no excuse.

I must have hesitated too long, because Vegeta suddenly grew skeptical; and then comprehension dawned on his face.

"You... you're not from here, are you?" he asked quietly. Obviously, he didn't just mean my location.

I started to protest, to defend my carefully construct wall of secrecy, but I realized there was nothing I could say, and the wall just came crashing down. I released my disguise with a defeated sigh, and my hair and eyes turned black.

Shock flooded Vegeta's face, and he was speechless for a small eternity.

"It's not just your face... a-and your voice..." he breathed, "Y-you _are_ Kakarot..."

I winced, waiting for him to shove me away and shout at me, or at least back away in terror.

What I didn't expect was for him to reach out slowly and cup my cheek in his hand. But he did.

"You're all alone, aren't you?" he murmured, his voice low with sympathy.

I hadn't thought of it like that, and I was conscious that I was shaking just slightly; as close to the brink of tears as I was likely to get. I remembered all the people and innocent living things I had killed. The billions of lives I had blown to bits for no real reason. I remembered all the lies I'd told and the huge mistakes I'd made, all in a matter of just days.

"Such a burden it must be," Vegeta said gently, "The guilt and conflict in your eyes... you've done something terrible."

I nodded mutely, too tired of lying and hiding to care if he knew anymore.

"Look at me, Kakarot," he whispered, tasting the name carefully as he applied it to me.

I did as he said dejectedly, "You were the only one who ever called me that," I muttered, one defiant tear escaping my eyelashes.

He looked a little confused, but he didn't question what I said; instead thumbing away the tear slowly, his depthless ebony eyes fixed on mine.

Then he surprised me completely. He leaned up to match my height and touched his lips to mine. I backed away from the contact quickly; more startled, actually, than offended as I think I should have been.

"Why did you...?" I began, touching my lips nervously as if looking for evidence of the brief kiss there.

He looked at me unapologetically, but compassionately, "No one has ever cared enough to do that; have they, Kakarot?"

I stared at him with my mouth slightly ajar in confusion. Of course I'd been kissed before, but I think he meant no one had ever done it for _me,_ rather than for themselves. Was that true of ChiChi too? Of the few kisses _she'd _instigated, had she ever done it just for me? I doubted it. I don't think she thought I was smart or sensitive enough to care one way or the other.

And the strange thing was... I _did_ care.

"It's alright, Kakarot," Vegeta assured me, "I know you just need someone to care. Go ahead."

I knew what he was offering, but I felt uncertain.

He was right, though. I don't know how long I'd waited for someone, _anyone,_ to see past the barrier I'd put up. Now it was wide open to Vegeta, and he wasn't turning away.

"Don't tell anyone about this," I implored shakily, changing back to Super Saiyan out of sheer nerves, "Please."

"Of course not," he promised. I counted on his inability to lie for the small amount of trust I was putting in him.

Before I could change my mind, I took his invitation and covered his mouth with my own, almost desperately. And before I was consumed by the need I didn't know I even had, I thought that in all my life I never would have guessed I'd be kissing my arch rival, much less that he'd allow me to.

Vegeta took control of the kiss after a moment, more because I didn't know what I was doing than anything else. Before long he had me shaking with pleasure, though I never thought I'd get such pleasure from _him._

"I know you," he murmured against my lips, "I've gotten to know you for years. I know what you like," he gently bit my lower lip, making me gasp, "And I know what turns you on _unbearably._"

I lost track of one of his wandering hands as it brushed under the bottom hem of my shirt and grazed my lower back.

I fell forward into his shoulder, burying a shout in his shirt as a lightning bolt of agonizing pleasure tore through my spine.

"What did you -?" I began breathlessly.

"Tail scar," he explained, nuzzling the side of my neck lightly, "Of course, usually I'd have a whole tail to work with, but this will do."

I remembered how sensitive my tail had been when I'd had it as a kid. No one had ever used it for pleasure, and I didn't even know the scar _could _be used for that.

"Are you alright?" he asked, running a hand lightly through my blonde hair.

I nodded into his shoulder, "Just... don't stop yet..."

he smiled and brought my face back up to his, still torturing my tail scar with feathering touches, making me groan low in my throat.

"Hmm," he sighed, "I think with a little practice I can bring out the _eagerness_ I'm used to seeing in you."

He kissed me briefly before opening the door behind me and guiding both of us inside.

It was dark in the bedroom and I waited for my eyes to adjust, suddenly nervous.

The prince gradually pinned me on the bed, capturing my lips in a slow, leisurely kiss. He must have seen the uncertainty and bordering panic of my face, though, because he paused.

"I'll only do this if you want it," he said slowly, "If you're not comfortable with it, I understand, and I'll stop. I just want to help you."

"Why?" I asked quietly, "Why do you want to help me?"

"I know you're different from _my_ Kakarot, but I'm not sure how far the difference extends. I know you're the same kind of person he is though, and I know how to help him when _he's_ upset."

"How's that?" I asked.

"Replace a bad memory with a good one," he replied, flicking his tail across my leg.

I looked up at him, debating silently in my head. I _had_ hoped to fix what I'd done to this world without leaving my influence on it; without digging in too deep or changing anything more than I already had here.

Then again, Vegeta had a point, and I realized I'd already left too big of a footprint in this universe anyway.

"Ah, hell with it," I muttered, "Okay. Do what you want."

"This is about _you_, Kakarot," he soothed, "What do _you_ want?"

I don't think anyone had ever asked me that seriously. Maybe I'd been a bit _too_ selfless in my life, to the point where I'd let myself get pushed around. I was allowed to think about myself _sometimes,_ right?

"I just want to let go," I answered honestly, "I want to forget."

He read the meaning in my eyes and nodded in understanding.

He dipped his head and initiated a long kiss, stroking a flexible leg along the length of mine. I felt his tongue searching for entry, and – throwing the last bits of my caution to hell – I granted him the access he sought.

I was surprised by the level of pleasure I immediately shot to as he explored my mouth with his talented tongue. Was I really turned on by the very person I'd hated with a vengeance just days ago?

I broke the kiss and looked up at the prince uncertainly, trying to see the scornful bastard that had been the cause of my greatest mistake.

Oh gods, once I started _looking,_ I could see the spitting resemblance in him. Of course, they _were_ the same person... but... seeing that face... remembering what he'd said, what he'd _done._...

"Something wrong?" the prince asked concernedly, likely seeing the comprehension and dawning horror appearing on my face.

Suddenly I couldn't do it. I sat up, causing him to sit up as well, and moved to the edge of the bed, looking down at the floor and taking deep breaths; I wondered if I was going to vomit, because I sure as hell felt sick. What was I _doing_?!

"Kakarot...?" Vegeta asked my back.

I remembered how the Vegeta I knew had spat the name like a curse, usually accompanied by insults and sneering.

"Goku," I corrected bluntly, "It's Goku."

"What happened?" he queried, "Did I hurt you?"

Gods, he didn't know it, but he'd hurt me _so much..._ not outside, but inside.

I nodded slowly, refusing to look at him.

"Kakar..." he cut himself off and amended hastily, "Goku, what's wrong?"

"I... I just... I..." I stammered, closing my eyes and trying to simplify my swirling emotions.

"You can tell me anything, you know," he murmured, "I know you well enough to know how valuable secrets are to you."

"But that's just it," I muttered angrily, "You _think_ you know me so well, but you don't. You know _him."_

"You're the same person," he pointed out.

"But he hasn't..." I gulped a breath and plunged on, "He hasn't _done_ what I've done!"

There was a moment of ringing silence and I felt tears burn my eyes, though having no idea why. I didn't usually cry, but I'd seen and done some really terrible things as of late, so I could understand if my emotions were upside-down too when everything else was.

"What _have_ you done?" the prince asked quietly.

"As if _you'd_ understand," I growled, whipping around to face him, "You're the cause if it all."

"I... _what?_" he demanded.

"If it weren't for you," I took a deep inhalation, "If it weren't for you, _this_ wouldn't exist!"

"What wouldn't?" he didn't seem angry, just confused.

"_This!_ All of this!" I snarled, "In my universe, I..."

I broke off, realizing I'd said _way_ too much.

Vegeta stared at me, "In 'your universe'?" Okay, _now,_ he sounded pretty angry, but more shocked than anything else, "In _your_ universe?" he repeated, is voice growing into almost a shout.

"That's not what I -" I began quickly, wishing I could take it back, "...I mean... I didn't..."

"I'll ask you _one_ time," he gritted out, glaring at me with fire in his eyes, "_What. Have. You. Done_?"

I winced, but only because he sounded _so_ much like the Vegeta I'd known. The cruel, spiteful, hateful Vegeta that had driven me to destroy the Earth.

"I made a... a wish," I forced out, my voice sounded choked, and I wondered why I was telling him this. I didn't owe him the truth, and I wouldn't gain anything from telling him.

...Or would I?

Maybe I did owe him. After all, it was _my_ fault he was even... like this.

And maybe I _would_ gain something from coming clean. If nothing else, it might take some of the weight off my shoulders. And he _had_ sworn not to tell anyone, hadn't he?

"I made a wish on the dragonballs," I muttered, "And that's why I'm here."

"What did you wish for?" Vegeta asked, some of the anger fading since I started talking. I noticed he didn't ask about the dragonballs, so he must have known what they were already.

"To... fix a mistake I made..." I said carefully, unsure what I could say. Nothing seemed justified anymore.

"What did you do?' the prince inquired.

"I d... I destroyed the Earth," I winced as the stammering sentence left me. I wasn't supposed to use the word "Earth" anymore, but it was a hard habit to break.

Vegeta was quiet for a long time.

"How? Why?" he demanded, some of the edge re-entering his voice.

What could I say? That I'd obliterated my home because he'd slept with my wife? _Was_ that the reason I had, or was it just the final straw that made me snap?

"Gods, Vegeta, I don't even know anymore." I sighed, hiding my face in my hands.

There was a long, tense silence.

"You're lying," the prince said after a moment, "You couldn't have destroyed the Earth or you wouldn't have been able to use the dragonballs."

Just as I thought. He didn't know about the dragonballs on Namek.

"I'm not lying," I objected, "Although I kind of wish I was."

"But how -?" he began.

"Don't ask me how, just listen." I growled impatiently, "I tried to wish everything back to normal. I _really _did, but I accidentally misspoke the wording of the wish and I ended up here."

"What does any of that have to do with me?" Vegeta muttered, "I don't see a connection here, Kakarot... Goku... whatever."

"I... I was mad at you," I said slowly, "And you... you said something, _did _something... that made me so angry that I blew up the planet."

"Then how are you even alive?" he demanded, "How am _I?_Why are there two Kakarots? And _why_ did you let me kiss you if you _hate_ me so much?"

He sounded sad, hurt; and his frustration was as evident in his voice and face as his confusion.

"I don't remember any of that," the prince went on with a low sigh, "I don't remember you hating me... and the thought of... of _hurting_ you like that... I... I _couldn't..._"

Something slapped me in the face right then. Something I'd overlooked. I'd been so worried about getting caught, and then getting him to understand... that I'd forgotten I wasn't talking to the Vegeta that could shrug it off and walk away. I'd forgotten that this Vegeta had feelings for... for _me..._ and the idea of me hating him must have seemed unthinkable.

It seemed cruel of me, then, to shove all my burdens on him like that, without considering the fact that it might hurt him.

And I realized that this Vegeta actually had a heart to break.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

"_The significant problems we have cannot be solved with the same level of thinking with which we created them."_

_-_Albert Einstein

Gravity – Chapter 9

"What... What happened, Kakarot?" Vegeta asked slowly, "Why don't I remember anything you said?"

"It's not that you don't _remember,_" I said tactfully, "It's just... _you_ didn't do any of that."

"Well then why did -?"

"I just..." I interrupted, my fingers knotting in my own hair in frustration. I had to tell him now; there was no backing out, I was in too deep.

"I accidentally wished for a universe where you couldn't commit sin," I said bluntly, forcing the words past my reluctant tongue and defiant teeth, "The dragon misunderstood, I didn't _mean_ to -"

I watched his dark eyebrows lower dangerously. I'd seen that look before, and I knew exactly what it meant. He wasn't frustrated, he wasn't angry... he was _furious._

"Vegeta, I -" I began pleadingly, trying to apologize for what I'd done.

He cut me off, but he didn't shout, didn't even raise his voice.

"So I can't do _this?_" he said mutinously, standing up quickly and circling the bed to face me. He raised a hand with on finger pointed at my chest, breathing shakily. A spark of yellow ki lit the digit and he took aim; I knew he was just trying to test what I said... but if I was wrong, I was going to die.

The energy beam began to form, and I tensed. Maybe I _was_ wrong. Parunga had said the prince was _free_ of sin, not necessarily that he _couldn't_ sin.

Abruptly, though, the energy flickered out and Vegeta crumpled to his knees with a shout of pain, clutching his forehead as if he was being attacked... from the _inside._

"W-what d- AAAH! - did you... ngh... did you _do_ to me?" he screamed, breathing hard and shaking, still gripping his forehead.

I stared in shock, unable to make myself move.

I was right. The _moment_ Vegeta's intentions had turned to murder, his own body had rebelled against itself. He _physically_ _couldn't_ do it.

"_Alright, dammit, I wouldn't have done it!"_ he shouted, as if to the heavens, and I saw his face was streaked with tears. Whatever was possessing him seemed to let go, and he collapsed on one side, shivering and curled up like a wounded animal.

"...Vegeta...?" I asked tentatively.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." he whispered discordantly, "N-no more... I'm sor-ry... pl-please_,_ no... no more..."

"What happened?" I inquired gently.

He looked like he'd been tortured, or that he'd watched someone die.

"You tell me!" he screamed raggedly, breaking down into tears again, "Why... why would you do that...?" he murmured, almost to himself, "Why would you do that to me?"

I slowly stood up and walked over to him, kneeling to look him in the eye.

"What did I do?" I asked carefully.

He flinched and recoiled slightly, holding up a hand as if to ward me off.

"N... no more... hurt..." he stammered listlessly, "Y-you... _you_ did it. It's _your_ fault... it's all your fault..." I winced, but he wasn't done; he gulped a breath and dared to look at me, "You and your _stupid wish._"

X

"So every time I do _anything_ against the gods' will, my own body _punishes_ me?" Vegeta asked waveringly once I'd explained what I knew. What I'd _guessed._

We were sitting across from each other at the kitchen table, but he refused to look at me. Instead he studied his hands clasped on the table in front of him.

"Have you... ever done anything like that before?" I asked.

He shook his head slowly, "I never thought I needed to."

What contrast to the Vegeta I'd known, who'd killed thousands – maybe _millions_ – both on orders and for fun.

"But you said all Saiyans were required to fight by law," I protested.

"I also said that my father didn't expect me to unless I chose to," he pointed out, "I've fought before, don't get me wrong. I wouldn't _be_ Saiyan if I didn't, but..."

"You never fought to kill..." I muttered, understanding.

"No," he sighed, "Come to think of it... I've _never_ broken the gods' code before. I've never stolen, I've never killed, I've never lied... never had a rash affair... or taken advantage... of someone... I just... I never noticed until now."

I took a moment to appreciate that I'd done at least half of those things at some point. To be _truly sinless..._ it sounded like perfection, but it must be hard on Vegeta himself. Then again, he hadn't _known_ he physically couldn't sin, so it hadn't made a difference to him... that is until I _told_ him about it.

The door swung open and Kakarot stepped inside, closing the door behind him and turning to us.

I was glad I'd kept up my Super Saiyan disguise; I could trust Vegeta to keep a secret because he couldn't lie, but I doubted I could trust Kakarot the same way.

And that brought to mind a new question...

If you can't trust _yourself..._ who _can_ you trust?

X

"You have to tell him, you know."Vegeta muttered once there was a moment's silence. I blinked at the prince, then looked slightly next to him where Kakarot sat almost rigidly. I knew Vegeta was right; nothing this big could be kept secret for long. But I didn't look forward to explaining who I was to Kakarot... nor why I was here or what I had done.

"Tell me what?" Kakarot asked sharply, and I wondered at his tone.

I opened my mouth to say something, but the words were just gone.

"I... I... Vegeta, I can't," I said, "I can't do it."

"Coward," Vegeta growled, "Release me from my vow of secrecy and _I'll_ do it. But it would sound a lot better coming from _you._"

I looked at him for a long moment. I was used to seeing anger and condescending irritation on his face, but now all I saw was despair and a slight edge of dislike. I think it was more directed at the situation than at me, but it was still one of the saddest things I'd ever seen. The proud prince was just broken now; and much as I loathed to admit it, I realized I'd almost _rather_ have the old Vegeta back. Even if he hated me, at least he wasn't... _lost_ like this. At least I could count on him to know what to do.

Vegeta was right, I was a coward.

"I can't do it," I repeated, "You tell him."

Whatever compassionate respect for me that was left in the prince's eyes vanished. And once it was gone I realized it hadn't been just friendly empathy and respect. It had been love. He loved me as much as he did _his_ Kakarot... at least he _had._ He must have thought us to literally be the same person, an impression that grew less and less true the more he learned about me. And now there was just nothing to compare, and I was a stranger to him again. Worse, a stranger that hid behind his lover's face and shamelessly rent his innocence to shreds with it; drawing him in only to shatter his carefully constructed grasp on reality. At least, that's how he must have seen it.

Eventually he just sighed, "Kakarot... meet Kakarot." he said to his companion. There was a note in his voice that might have been hopelessness.

The dark-haired version of me looked extremely confused, tail swishing in question. Then he looked at me, eyebrows furrowed slightly in a look of piercing scrutiny.

I released my Super Saiyan disguise again, deciding there was no other way to prove it.

Comprehension and shock slapped y twin in the face and he whirled on Vegeta, anger evident in his movements.

Wait... _Anger?_...At _Vegeta?_... Why?

"_What _ did you do?" he snapped, his black tail thrashing in near-fury.

"_I_ didn't do this,"Vegeta objected smoothly/

"No, what did you do with... with _him?_" Kakarot snarled, "Gods, I can smell your scent all over him!"

So that was why he was angry. He thought Vegeta had been cheating on him, a premonition that hardly diminished once he realized we were the same person.

"Nothing!" Vegeta said too quickly, guilt flashing in his eyes.

"Did you sleep with him?" Kakarot sounded hurt now, some of the anger replaced by betrayal, "Just because he looks like me doesn't mean you can -!"

"No!" Vegeta shouted pleadingly, "Kakarot how can you even _think_ that I'd -?"

"Liar," Kakarot seethed, turning his back on the prince.

"He didn't," I interjected, wondering how it had gone from a simple matter of identity confusion to _this_ so quickly.

And I remembered how close Vegeta had come to actually doing what Kakarot thought he had. I was glad now that I'd told him no, though if I hadn't explained what I'd done to his universe, he may very well have anyway.

"It was just a kiss, Kakarot," Vegeta implored, "Nothing else."

"You _did_ kiss him?" he sounded outraged, "What, am I not enough for you?"

"It's not like that!" the prince protested desperately, "I _love_ you. You know that."

"Do you 'love' him too?" Kakarot snapped, "Or is it just words to you?"

Vegeta fell silent, either unable or unwilling to respond, his eyes were just dark pools of pain.

"Did you think," Kakarot went on, his voice shaking with anger, "That if he and I were the same that it wouldn't matter? That I'd be okay with it as long as it was just another _version_ of me?"

"Kakarot," Vegeta begged, "Koi, I promise, it's not what you think. I would never do that to you."

_He's not _able_ to,_ I thought,_ but I don't think that's the reason why he wouldn't._

"Well then what was it?" Kakarot growled, "A moment of weakness? _Temptation?_"

"No," Vegeta's tail drooped slightly. I don't think he'd expected Kakarot to be so angry. Especially directing his anger at the prince instead of...

"Why aren't you angry at _me?" _I asked, confused, "I did just as much wrong as Vegeta did, for all you know, I could have -"

He didn't let me finish.

"Because I expected better of him," Kakarot muttered, "And I know _I_ wouldn't intentionally hurt someone I was close to; and as far as I gather, you are me, so you wouldn't either."

A rather backwards type of logic; but logical nonetheless.

"Why then, Vegeta?" Kakarot said after a moment, "Why would you cheat on me?"

The prince winced as if he had a headache, and I could almost see the dismay in his eyes. Kakarot was getting the information in the wrong order, and it had caused a rather huge misunderstanding.

"He can't," I said, throwing my doubts out the proverbial window and beginning to explain what I'd done, "Vegeta can't cheat on you."

"Why not? Why wouldn't he?" Kakarot snapped, still sounding betrayed.

I shook my head, "It's not that he _wouldn't," _I ignored the spark of offense on both of their faces, "He _physically can't._ It's not possible for him."

"Again, why not?" Kakarot growled, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I have a..." Vegeta began, "A... _spell_, if you would, cast over me."

"By an enchantress in a castle?" Kakarot said sarcastically, "Is this some fairytale and you're the handsome prince?"

"I did it." I admitted, somehow feeling a swamp of relief flood through me with the confession; like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

"I did it," I repeated, "It's because of me that Vegeta's the way he is. I made a wish on the dragonballs."

"The what?" Kakarot asked, perplexed.

I faltered. Kakarot didn't know about the dragonballs? But Vegeta _did?_

Vegeta sighed, "I'd hoped you _wouldn't_ say that," he said to me, "Only the king and a few individuals know about the dragonballs anymore; barely anyone remembers that they even exist. And over the years it's become harder and harder to find them anyway; they've simply faded into legend."

"But they _do_ exist?" I asked carefully.

"As far as I know," the prince shrugged, "Personally, I've never seen them before in my life, but I know of their wish-granting capabilities."

"That's besides the point," Kakarot muttered, "Whatever these 'dragonballs' are, you say _you're_ responsible for... something... that happened to Vegeta?"

His dark eyes burned into mine. I hadn't known my own face could be so intimidating; was that why some people cringed if I glared at them?

"I accidentally wished for Vegeta to be unable to commit sin. And as a result, I ended up here."

"I'm still not sure how that works," Vegeta said, "What could you have wished for that was misinterpreted as _that?_"

"The dragon I spoke to didn't speak this language," I explained, "So I had to get someone who could translate. The wish itself was kind of vague."

"What did you actually wish for?" Kakarot asked, sitting back down from where he'd been pacing angrily.

"I wished to be taken to a time before Vegeta – the Vegeta _I_ knew – had committed a sin that caused me to destroy the world," I said honestly, trying to savor the freedom of not having to lie or pretend for now.

"How did you -?" Kakarot began.

"Long story," I sighed, wishing there were an easier way to explain. If my audience had been anyone besides these two, I would have refused obstinately to even say as much as I had. I would probably have refused to lower my disguise as well and ignore any questions of any kind.

But lying to _myself_ was nigh on impossible, so why should I even think of deceiving Kakarot? He knew me perhaps even better than _I_ did, because he didn't share my tendency to hide my true intelligence; he didn't share my self-imposed mask. He'd been raised among Saiyans; he was one of them, and was allowed, even encouraged, to be so.

Vegeta was another story. He already knew a lot about me, and it had been difficult for me to fool him in the first place because he was so sharp and observant. Even when he was my enemy, he knew next to everything about me. Maybe it was because he wanted to know my strengths and weaknesses – a "know your enemy" kind of thing – or maybe it was because I didn't have to hide as much around him. He was the only other Saiyan in existence beside me in my universe, so he couldn't judge me by human standards for the flaws that he shared with me; like a love of battle and a lust for blood.

Now, though, he couldn't lie; he couldn't take advantage of me and was even reluctant to hate anyone. So while I could tell him almost anything, I almost felt like I had to treat him as I would a young child. Too much of the wrong information could easily corrupt an untainted soul, and it was a new and strange experience to think of Vegeta as innocent in any way.

But, strange or not, that's what he was now.

I looked up at the faces of the two people – the _only_ two – that I could trust with all of my secrets and flaws. The only two who wouldn't judge me like a human would, nor demean me in any way for being who I was.

And I realized I could tell them anything and everything.

A knowing, but small smile came to rest on Vegeta's lips.

"We're listening," he said.

TBC

_((This is the last full chapter I have written out on paper, so the updates for this story are likely going to be slower since I'm essentially running blind without a plan now. I'll try to keep up with it, but this plot is extremely complicated if you haven't noticed. This is also my first time using real Japanese lingo in my dialogue. The word "koi" meaning "love", (a title) just because my sister requested it._

_Thanks for reading and reviewing, as always._

_-Shinsun))_


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